... (and in this case there are more than two), Lord, I can ease my mind out beyond my soul and view my life from a cerebral perspective. This tends to be an escape for me. The cerebral perspective a little less heavy, a little less messy, and a little more predictable than my heart's perspective - and even your perspective Lord.
I've been ignoring you Lord. Going cerebral on you. Perhaps this is becoming a pattern - the returning and retreating, the retreating and returning, as deeper we go through the grief. It's changing up on me, becoming more real as the realization that she's not here any more anchors itself further into my heart. And I'm missing her more and more. Her quiet laughter, the sound of her voice, her facial expressions - I haven't forgotten. But it hurts to remember. And I'm angry because you have her and we don't.
But that's on one hand.
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