Facebook - A Whole New World

So, I've been talking to a few old high school friends lately and they have been pressuring me to create a facebook account. "But I already did a few months back," I told them. "We couldn't find you." They told me. Well, friends, let me just tell you - I found myself. So don't tell me you can't find me - you aren't looking hard enough. I created the account (according to my facebook records) in January and haven't been back since. Until tonight. And after I requested a new password (because I forgot my old one), I found myself quite easily. I still only have one friend - thanks Corinne! - but I did put my artsy fartsy picture of myself up and I did ask to become friends with Minista Sista and Angie and Trina. So, if they deny me their friendship then I'll be pissed and will seek revenge. And I know where they live. So let that be a warning to all those who I've yet to ask friendship permission - don't risk my wrath!

Loads Of Laundry, Loads Of Work - Is It My Naptime Yet?

That's why I'm writing this post with nothing to keep your interest. It's simply a procrastination tool I'm using to keep me from cleaning out my fridge, washing down the kitchen cabinets, doing laundry, cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming and moping floors, writing thank-yous, making phone calls, storing away our winter clothing and replacing them with summer cloths ... the list is endless and overwhelming. Please tell me how long and overwhelming your list is - I need to know I'm not the only one! I can't stand supermoms! They make me look bad. That should be a post for another day - Why I Hate Supermoms. Sounds like a good ranting post. If you consider yourself a supermom then I am sorry for saying I hate you. But you must understand, you make me look bad. And you make me tired - how can you do it all, be it all, and still stay sane and beautiful? I do the bare minimum and I'm going insane at rapid speed while my hair is thinning and my face is breaking out like a teeny bopper's. And the dreaded time of year is fast approaching - I'll have my kids full-time at home driving me batty all summer. I'm definitely NOT the typical mom in that I'm looking forward to having my kids home 24/7 for a couple months! Does anybody have any great ideas in activities (the less it costs the better) that keep the monkeys occupied for awhile? I don't want to have to drive much this summer. We will be signing up for the summer reading program at our local library. I need to get a slip-n-slide or something. What works great for your kiddos? The less involved I need to be the better! (yeah, your lookin' pretty good as a mommy right now aren't you - I can see you through the computer screen patting yourself on the back!)

Well, the washer is done which means I need to put Little Miss's bedding into the dryer. And start in on another mound of laundry. I only have 2 kids, why does it seem like I have 20?

The Inquisition And Deportation Of A Squirrel

The squirrel, restrained by the use of a few rubber bands, sat on a white plastic Barbie chair with a white plastic Barbie table in front. I sat across from him - not in a white plastic Barbie chair. To the side was the bb gun hunter , gun pointed at the hairy knee caps of the squirrel. Behind me paced Hurricane EE, just itching to shoot the tree rodent himself. Squirrel was bathed by the light of a pen light which was held by Little Miss.

"Okay Squirrel, spit it out. Tell me what you tree rodents are up to." My stare bored into his beady eyes. He wasn't budging. The bb gun hunter started pumping his gun. One pump. Two pumps. I held my hand up to stop him.

"I'll know if you're lying Squirrel. I have a sworn statement of Chipmunk who witnessed everything," I lied. Squirrel said nothing but blinked. Hurricane EE charged towards Squirrel, but I held my hand up again. He growled at the
squirrel but kept his place. The bb gun hunter resumed his pumping. Three pumps. Four pumps.

"I see you are resisting our attempt at being hospitable. Perhaps I should have the bb gun hunter take out your knee caps. Would you be more cooperative then? Hmmmmmmm?" A bead of sweat trailed down the side of Squirrel's face. Five pumps. Six pumps.

"We saw the Blue Jays in the tree - we know they're your suppliers. If you tell us, we'll make you a deal. We'll put you in the witness protection program. We know you are recruiting your comrades from across the street. Tell us everything, and things will go well for you. Tell us nothing, and we'll deport your little ass to the county dump. There are no trees there pal - no nuts. It's a stinky wasteland. You won't survive the night my little hairy friend." Squirrel started fidgeting around. Little Miss intensified the light. Still, Squirrel kept quiet.

In the end we deported Squirrel to the Landfill - just like we promised him. The dump is fast becoming the 4th largest mountain in the North Atlantic States. Each year it has gotten bigger and bigger as trash is thrown and buried there. Rumor has it that ski lifts will be installed within the next couple of years. A ski resort and spa will be developed on the site. If squirrel survives that long, he will once again be deported. This time to Morris Meadows campground, a place where the mentally insane squirrels are institutionalized. Heaven help the little bugger.

To this day we have no idea what the squirrels were up to. Little Miss swears she's seen them hang upside down from branches by their tails. Why would a dozen squirrels congragate in one tree for days upon days, biting off the branches? Squirrels are not known to socialize with eachother - I learned that at Nixon park this week. 'Tis a mystery for sure.

Drifting by Bebo Norman

*I have this song listed as #2 on my play list if you want to listen to it as you read it.

Sometimes when I'm all alone
I don't know if I can
Take another breath
Some say home is where the heart is
Tell me where my home is
Cause I am scared to death

Falling from the rooftop
Crashing like a raindrop
Can you make my heart stop
Shaking like a leaf
Standing at the floodgate
Steady as an earthquake
Can you hear my heart break
Tearing at the seams

I am drifting in the deep end
Holding on to your hand
Is all that saves me now
Life can treat you like a beggar
You hold me together
But I don't know how

Falling from the rooftop
Crashing like a raindrop
Can you make my heart stop
Shaking like a leaf
Standing at the floodgate
Steady as an earthquake
Can you hear my heart break
Tearing at the seams

Some say home is where the heart is
And my heart is in your hands
You are all I need

Rising from the ashes lifted from the madness
Now you see my heart is
Deep enough to dream
Heal me from the deathblow
Lead and I will follow
Now you feel my heart glow
Mending at the seams

Feeling Weird

As we were packing up our camping gear yesterday (we camped with 7 other families this past weekend), anxiety hit big-time. I did not want to go back home. Camping was a good escape from the stress, grief, and new reality. I had my moments where it would hit, but for the most part I was away not only physically but emotionally too - it was a good break.

I haven't opened my bible in over a month. I didn't want to have to read about Paul (yes friends, I'm still in Acts) and all that God allowed him to go through. One of the many thoughts that are running around in my head is the fact that although what we as family and friends of Michelle are going through now really sucks, in comparison to what others have faced throughout history, we have it pretty good. Then the devil's advocate in me kicks in with - "well, you're still young, a lot more crappy things can happen yet." I just finished a book about a black Cherokee woman who walked the Trail Of Tears. It's a fictitious book, but historically accurate. I felt a bit shamed after reading that book for all the self-pitying I've put myself through. I've only lost one close person, who am I to complain? I have been pampered compared to most of the people who live in this world right now.

I finally did open my bible today and read in Acts. Then I flipped through Psalms, which aren't really my favorite but I did so anyway - isn't that where one should go if one's struggling spiritually? I wasn't drawn to the depressing Psalms, I was drawn to the praise and worship ones. In my time with the Lord this morning I needed to ask forgiveness. I didn't use words - what could I say? But He heard me none-the-less. These are tough times for me personally. I haven't been the best mom. In fact, I sent Hurricane EE to school on the bus with tears in his eyes this morning. Because of me. I haven't been the most affectionate wife (I'm not a hugger or kisser in normal times either) and I certainly am not focused on helping hubby through his job stress. I'm stuck inside my head much of the time, which, again, is typical, but heigthend at present. I become angry and resentful when the kids are fighting and I have to leave my thoughts to straighten things out with them. I'm not the best friend to have at the moment - I will pray for you but only sporadically. I'm not coming to visit you and I won't be calling you. (yeah yeah, that's not much different either!). I haven't sent out thank yous yet.

It's a weird time. For all the conclusions I make in my head, I make contradicting ones to match. I normally do this too. I'm wondering when stress hits like this, if all the negative characteristics of a person get intensified? I'm thinking so in my case.

Thanks friends for letting me vent. I needed to get it out. I will be posting on much more lighter topics in the near future - one being an update on our squirrel situation. We have one in custody as I write. We'll be interrogating him here shortly. We're letting him sweat it out as he waits for us. He appears to be a tough little bugger. But we have our ways. We'll get the truth out of him, no worries.

Because It Makes Me Giggle

I make no apologies - I need my giggle source. And where else to find it than listening to the Flight Of The Conchords? I finally figured out how to include music to my blog! Scroll down to the widget music thingy. I have 10 songs. Only a few are fun - sorry. But if you listen to the last song, perhaps, if it doesn't offend you, it will elicit a giggle from you too. For those who aren't familiar with this group - they are comedians. In this song they are just making fun of rap songs - keep that in mind. And every now and then I'll switch out the songs, so make sure you check it out now and then.

For those who might be offended - I make my apologies. I realize it is not a godly song, and you might be forced to swear in your head if you listen to it. And they keep repeating it over and over and over again (that's the great part about it isn't it Conchord fans?) and so you keep swearing and swearing over and over. It's awful I know. That's why it's the last song - perhaps no one will notice it's down there.

But for those who would like the song, I have pointed the way to it.

So go to it being forewarned.

Spring by Prince Redcloud

How Pleasing -
not
to be
freezing.

My sentiments exactly.